Wednesday, May 19, 2004
Volokh Conspiracy has captured this lovely Amazon.com product review (written by 'a toy enthusiast from Sandy Springs, GA') for the world to enjoy:Uncle Milton's Giant Ant Farm is a fun, interactive way to teach children ages 5 and up about unceasing, backbreaking toil and the cold, inescapable reality of death. My little ones had a front-row seat as worker ants labored, day in and day out, until they inevitably died of exhaustion, their futile efforts all for naught. The ant farm, complete with stackable tiny ant barns, see-through 'Antway' travel tubes, and connecting 'Antports,' is a child's window into the years of thankless, grueling labor that await them as worker drones in our post-industrial society. It's the fun way to teach your kids to accept their miserable fate stoically. [read more...]Isn't that sweet? It reads like the musings of some bastard child of James Lileks and August Strindberg. But wait, there's more! I visited the Amazon page featuring Uncle Milton's Giant Ant Farm, and discovered that plastic-boxed hormigas are one controversial toy.
Boy you Liberals need to take it easy and have some fun. Warning, your child will also become a LIBERAL if: 1]You don't buy him a BB gun 2]you don't get him a mini bike 3]you don't buy him a hatchet and chop a tree down (a tree is a renewable resorce) and 4]Make sure he has been spanked when disciplined, this will make him aggressive, last thing you need is an uncompetitive whimpy, whiny, LIBERAL as a son. OH, and buy him an ant farm, even let him kill the ants himself.And lastly, a reviewer from Rochester, Minnesota had this to say:
Dear readers,
I do not understand one thing. Why are some of you so shalow. I do not own an ant farm, yet. However, I will buy one soon and enjoy it, whether the ants die in two weeks or not. After reviewing some of the comments concerning the ant farms, it seems to me as though you help the ants die. You either overfeed them, or knock the farm down, etc. Stop complaining and cheer up.
Do you really expect the ants to live as long as you do. Just imagine yourselves traveling across US in a dark box. Ofcourse they will die sooner than you expect. When they do, just go to the woods and find some. Don't complain about them biting. Would not you try to protect yourselves if someone would chase you around trying to capture you.
And parents, please be more responsible. If your children are too energetic, do not buy them an ant farm. Go out with them into the woods and show them ant's natural habitat. Your kids will love it, I know. Please do not be angry with me. I just think that some of you negative comments make you look bad.
Meet Your New Neighbor, A[u]nt Killjoy!
